Marry Me Galbijjim

The first time I invited my boyfriend to my place for dinner, I was so nervous. I remember standing in my kitchen, cutting the carrots and Korean radish into large chunks as the short ribs bubbled away on the stove, receiving text updates about his incoming flight SFO to PHL and getting more nervous by the minute. I wasn’t anxious because I didn’t know if he’d like the dish — I knew it would be delicious. No, I was nervous because of the expectations.

This photo was taken September 22, 2021. I’ll title it “Anxiety and galbi stew mise en place.” I even rounded the carrots and radish to make it extra pretty! 😅

Cooking has always been a love expression for me but as a young woman, I couldn’t unhear jokes from high school and college classmates about how a woman’s place is in the kitchen with some stupid punchline about making him a sandwich. I hated these jokes so much and I especially hated that it made me feel insecure about my joy and passion: making a beautiful meal and sharing it with someone I loved.

Anxious questions swirled around in my mind — if I make him this short rib stew this first time, would he come to expect it? Am I falling into a trad (”traditional”) role? What does it even mean to be a “modern woman”? What if he gets to know the real me…and doesn’t take me seriously?

All of these insecurities bubbled vigorously within me but what I learned that night convinced me that there are still good men out there. That he was a “modern man” himself with a good heart. That he didn’t have any expectations. That he knew how to hold my fears tenderly and put me at peace.

Three and a half years later, we are officially engaged and I couldn’t be more thrilled to share this recipe with you. I’m not saying that this galbijjim with kabocha squash, radish and mushrooms will heal you and usher in your future husband like a magic trick — but it just might.

Marry Me Galbi jjim (4 servings)

For the beef:

• 4 lbs beef short ribs, fat trimmed
• 5 garlic cloves
• 1/2 yellow onion, peeled
• 6-8 cups water

For the braising liquid:

• 3/4 cup soy sauce
• 4 TBSP honey
• 1/4 cup mirin
• 1/2 large apple or Korean pear, peeled and cored
• 1/2 yellow onion
• 6 garlic cloves
• Black pepper

For the stew:

• 1/2 large Korean radish, cut into large chunks
• 3 carrots, cut into large chunks
• 6 pyogo aka shiitake mushrooms, stemmed and cut into quarters
• 1/2 kabocha squash, cut into large chunks (1 large peeled Korean sweet potato works too)
• 10 frozen chestnuts (optional); fresh chestnuts roasted and peeled also work
• 4 jujubes aka Korean dates (optional)
• 3 scallion, sliced into 3 inch pieces
• Handful of pine nuts
• Drizzle sesame oil

Step 1. Soak the ribs in a big bowl of cold water to draw out the blood. After about 20 minutes, dump the water and add ribs in a large pot and cover with fresh cold water, about 6-8 cups. Add garlic and onion and bring to a boil. Reduce to medium low and simmer, skimming off any scum or oil that collects around the edge as it simmers. After 30 minutes, remove cooked ribs from the broth onto a tray or bowl and set aside. Strain the remaining broth to remove the aromatics. Discard the aromatics and refrigerate the broth for at least a few hours, ideally overnight. When the fat solidifies on top of the broth, remove the fat with a slotted spoon.

Step 2. Wash the pot and then add ribs back to the clean pot. In a blender, combine all ingredients for the braising liquid and add to the pot with the ribs, along with 4 cups of beef broth. Bring to a boil and then reduce to a simmer for 10 minutes with the lid on. Taste to adjust, adding more honey or salt or mirin as needed.

Step 3. Add the radish, carrots, and jujubes and simmer for 10 minutes, covered. Add kabocha squash (or sweet potato), mushroom, and chestnuts and cook for another 10 minutes, covered. Finally, add the scallions, and pine nuts and cook for 10 minutes, uncovered. If at any point you need more liquid, add more beef broth. Drizzle with a little sesame oil right before serving. Enjoy with steaming hot rice and kimchi!